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LC · Live Cattle ·Bridge of Death · Question 04 of 11

The Mother Cow’s Big Macs

The scene

You are a Knight of the Round Table — a Launcelot, a Galahad, a Sir Robin, perhaps King Arthur himself — and your quest, as you shall shortly declare, is to seek the Holy Grail. The road requires crossing the Gorge of Eternal Peril. The only way across is the Bridge of Death. There stands the Bridgekeeper, an old man with a staff, who will ask you three questions. Answer rightly, and he waves you past. Answer wrongly, and — into the gorge you will be thrown. Good luck.

At the bridge

“STOP! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.”

, Gorge of Eternal Peril.

1Question the first

What… is your name?

“

Answer

State your name.

2Question the second

What… is your quest?

“

Answer

I seek the Holy Grail of trading.

3Question the third

What… is the number of Big Mac burgers that a single beef cow produces across her entire breeding lifetime?

A single beef cow, somewhere in the Oklahoma panhandle. Born in 2020, bred in 2022, first calf in 2023, and she will keep calving once a year until roughly 2028. Four or five calves in all, each fattened to about 1,400 pounds. The Bridgekeeper, oddly familiar with McDonald’s menu specifications, asks how many Big Macs that lifetime adds up to.

Select one of the five answers below. Choose carefully, and accept your fate.